Mad Hatter and Madder Newsmen
This picture has been running around the internets (not on it’s OWN, because that’d be a little bit creepy, don’t you think?) for the past week or so - claiming to be the one and only Johnny Depp as the Mad Hatter
Looks pretty Mad to me! And slightly creepy which is, of course, Tim Burton’s specialty - and Depp’s delight. Other reports say that Johnny got so into character that he took a bite of his hat and ate it. Um. Ok.
In other news - Fox News is wondering if the recent increase of piracy is all Johnny Depp’s fault. Yes, there are modern day pirates. Greg Gutfeld, of “Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld” says that as Suadi Supertanger with over $100 million worth of oil has pushed the prices up again. Then there’s also a Danish ship that was taken, adding to the count of over 70 ships nailed this year.
Gutfeld says that it’s because it works. Ship owners prefer to deal with pirates one-on one- and pay millions which make it a safe financial risk. Of course, it’s mostly because of Johnny Depp - he of the “gorgeous hair, his gleaming muscles and his ample mascara” that has made pirating a “glorious occupation - one filled with delightful romanace and wondrous cosmetics.”
Unsurprisingly, Johnny and Disney haven’t anything to say to the ridiculousness that is what I hope to be - satire, while Gutfeld expounds on how pop culture finds evil more interesting then those who fight it “the killer being cool and the Christian always the punch line”
Next time you see him, yank off a nipple ring for me.
And if you disagree with me, then you sir are worse than Hitler.
Now I remember why I hate fox news. Heh.
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